Maxwell looked like he'd been run through by a bus. He was as weak and trembly as a newborn fawn and Andrew had to do his best not to smile while the man attempted to walk down the stairs, give up, and demand for Andrew to carry him down.
"You did this to me." Maxwell told him ominously, and Andrew just accepted the mild anger from the smaller man.
He had, in some regard, and he was fine being 'forced' to take care of him. It was such a hardship to carry around the man that he loved. It was devastating. Andrew was never going to recover from having Maxwell's warm, trusting body pressed against his own. Maxwell's trusting head pressed against his shoulder as the man breathed on his neck. Comfortable, safe.
It was such a burden.
Maxwell was in this state for two days. Andrew could tell that he was frustrated, and that there was a fire burning in his eyes. He even had a sit down with Andrew to discuss how they could next 'efficiently' manage the next session they had with the fuck machine. Andrew had to hold himself together as Maxwell seriously pulled up a step by step plan.
Andrew had no idea that the man had liked it so much that he made a step by step plan, with seven stages, that would help facilitate the next time they did it. Andrew wasn't able to keep his laughter inside the whole time and it ended up spilling over after he explained the fifth step.
Maxwell, who had been sitting in his big, comfy, intimidating office chair in his home office, had frowned deeply, staring at Andrew who was leaning over him to listen and observe him.
"Are you even taking this seriously?" Maxwell had said, annoyed at the fact that Andrew was laughing so hard. Andrew had barely composed himself before he leaned down, kissing Maxwell's face warmly, wetly, much to the other man's anger.
"Angel, I love you with all of my heart, and I do agree that some planning should go into this, but a seven step plan? It's called we take it slow. Not try to go four rounds in one night." Maxwell didn't like Andrew's reply.
"I don't want you to get jealous." Maxwell declared. "And it's only fair that I-" Andrew grinned, pressing his lips against Maxwell's to silence him. Maxwell made an upset noise, but let the man kiss him. When Andrew pulled back, he was staring at a rather pissed off looking Maxwell. His gaze was narrowed, his lips were turned down in a frown, and Andrew just adored him.
"Two rounds then. That's it. When you have more endurance, and you're used to it, we can revisit your plan, alright?" Andrew was suggesting it, but he wasn't really willing to budge. He thought they should only be doing it once, but if that was the cute reason that Maxwell had suggested four damn rounds two days ago, Andrew could compromise.
He could compromise a little, but not fully when it came to the other man's help. Maxwell pouted, looking upset. He crossed his arms as Andrew pulled back slightly, his hand on the back of Maxwell's chair. It gave him enough space to see Maxwell's pouty anger in full force.
It hit Andrew straight in the heart. The man was too freaking cute!
"If you tried the machine, you'd understand." He muttered darkly and Andrew felt his eyes widen, before he grinned.
"Do you want me to?" Andrew asked and watched as Maxwell's ears turned bright pink before it slid to his face. Normally there was a slight moment of hesitation. That did not happen this time.
Maxwell was well and truly embarrassed.
"Maxy, do you want me to be fucked by the fuck machine?" Andrew asked again, almost giddy with the sudden change. Maxwell, for his part, pushed against Andrew's chest when he leaned in.
"My god, give me some space!" That reaction, unlike Maxwell normally, told Andrew all that he needed to know. He was flustered, embarrassed.
"Have you thought of it?" Andrew asked, his curiosity getting the better of him as Maxwell squirmed in his big office chair.
"I-I would-"
"You absolutely have. Look at the colour you're turning! Did you think about it in the moment, or after?" Andrew gave the man some space, leaning against the desk so that he could watch Maxwell scramble. "It's fine if you have. I'm not mad, just mildly surprised. I didn't think you would imagine a machine fucking me before you did." Andrew said, purely wanting to stir Maxwell up further.
When Maxwell remained silent, his face bright red, and unable to meet Andrew's gaze as he sat there flustered, Andrew realised that maybe he had been thinking about fucking Andrew, but that the machine had come into play.
"Oh? Did you think about me sucking a cock while you fucked me?" Andrew asked and watched as Maxwell swallowed thickly. "Angel, darling, I had no idea." Andrew said and Maxwell looked uncomfortable.
"Why are you like this only with sexual things?" Maxwell muttered. "I mean, I know I'm bad, but you-" Maxwell cut off, covering his face with his hands as he took several deep breaths. "We're going to have to wrap everything up soon because Richard is coming back." Maxwell muttered. Andrew couldn't stop his smile as he looked over his sweet, sweet boyfriend.
"I just want you to be happy with me, and I never, ever want our sex life to be a reason that you are unhappy. So? You want to fuck me?" Andrew asked and watched as Maxwell jerked. "I'm not upset. I'm thrilled, actually. I get to take Maxwell Beckett's cock virginity. I'm going to have to brag to my Mom about this. She won't tell anyone. She's good at keeping secrets." Andrew teased as he watched Maxwell flinch.
"Andrew." Maxwell ground out, before he glared at him. "You are not bragging to your dead Mom about this!" Andrew laughed.
"Why not? She can't tell anyone! And she likes to know about my life too! We're going to be together forever, so what is a little bit of butt fucking between us, hmm?" Maxwell looked like he wanted the ground to swallow him up.
"Can I have, like, five minutes alone to gather my thoughts?" Maxwell asked, sounding truly exhausted and Andrew nodded. He smiled at Maxwell, looking at the man who had come at this confident and now looked like a deflated balloon.
"I love you, no matter what." Andrew told him. "I'll be in the kitchen. Let me know when you want to talk again." Andrew left, watching Maxwell for a few seconds from the doorway before he headed back for the kitchen.
It was about ten minutes later when Maxwell came into the room, a look of determination on his face. He did ask for help getting into the stool, since his legs weren't completely better, but Andrew didn't mind. Then, Andrew sat next to him, waiting.
"I…I am not having issues wrapping my head around fucking you." Maxwell said carefully. "In fact, I know it's fine. I'm excited, but ever since I awakened my more omega traits it's…" Maxwell hesitated. "What if my dick isn't big enough?" Maxwell asked softly and Andrew froze. "What if you don't feel good because I'm…smaller." Maxwell sounded quiet, and Andrew stared at the man blankly.
"Maxy, oh Angel." Maxwell flushed at the tone Andrew spoke with. He looked away. "That's not-"
"It is something to consider, and it wasn't something that was brought to my attention until after Richard moved in." Maxwell hesitated. "You can't breathe a word of this to him. He told me this in confidence, but it'll…explain why my mind went there." Andrew reached out, placing his hand over Maxwell's. He instantly turned his hand over and intertwined their hands.
"I won't say a thing. I won't even look at him differently." Andrew promised and Maxwell made a frustrated expression, like saying what he was about to say hurt him.
"Richard…his dick shrunk. He didn't tell me what size dick he had before, but he told me that he lost some of his size. He had no idea that omegas had smaller dicks. I've…I've never considered it before. I mean, how could anyone compare themselves to others when I'm sleeping with you? Your dick was always huge in comparison to mine." Maxwell looked nervous. "And then you brought home the fuck machine. I didn't think about it before or in the moment but I've been stewing over it a little bit." Maxwell glanced up at Andrew, nervous. "Is the dick on the machine normal sized? I'm not that big, Andy. What if I can't satisfy you?"
Andrew was frozen in his seat. He was sure that if he had a little less control, his jaw would be on the floor.
This wasn't a laughing matter, and Andrew didn't want to laugh. He was horrified that thoughts like this had been going through Maxwell's head and that he had no idea. He was very glad that the man had told him, but he was a little sad that it took this much prompting.
"Maxy, this is going to sound like a cop out but I just need you to hear me speak first, okay?" Maxwell nodded, his face grim as he stared at Andrew.
"Okay." Maxwell agreed, his tone hard as if he was bracing for something difficult to hear.
"I need you to understand that…orgasms aren't the end all and be all of sex. I know that we both kind of behave like they are. You like…you like cum, and that's fine! I like it too, which I think is why we are so focused on the orgasm side of things. With that being said, I'm not belittling your concern, really, truly I'm not. I just want you to know that I will find great satisfaction sleeping with you. No matter what." Andrew took in a shaky breath. "I don't care about your dick size. I know that's not comforting to you right now, but I swear to god, to me, it's more about the fact that we'll be connected. Do you get that?" Andrew asked, scanning Maxwell's face.
Maxwell was doing the same, and as much as he seemed to be hearing what Andrew was saying, he was clearly not fully satisfied with his words.
"I hear you, and I understand what you are saying but…I'm still worried. I want you to have a good time. What if you don't even get hard?" Maxwell asked and Andrew let out a harsh breath. Fuck. What Andrew wanted to do was drag the man upstairs and prove to him that it was going to be fine. They could do it right here, right now, and alleviate any of Maxwell's worries.
Too bad that Andrew knew that was the wrong thing to do.
"Maxwell, Angel, my sweet, sweet future husband. I get hard if you ask me to get hard, remember? Do you think I won't be hard with your cock in my ass? Are you being serious right now? Do you understand how ridiculous that sounds? Do you worry that you won't get hard when I'm in your ass?" Andrew asked and Maxwell shook his head, his gaze conflicted.
"That's…different though." Maxwell mumbled and Andrew let out a laugh.
"How, Maxy? How is that different? I've been bottoming since before I became an alpha. Every male body has a prostate. We'll be fine." Andrew promised and Maxwell squeezed his hand, giving him such a vulnerable and worried look that it broke Andrew's heart.
"Are you sure? That's why I was thinking about the machine. That way you could have a good time." Maxwell admitted and Andrew couldn't help it. He reached for the other man, not able to listen to him hurt alone. Andrew angled himself so that he wouldn't hurt the other man before pulling him into his lap. He hugged him tightly.
"Maxy. I don't need a fuck machine. I need you, alright? Don't you want to make a mess of me like I make a mess of you?" Andrew whispered against his throat. "Not that you can't do that from on top of me, but there's a…different feeling when you're inside of someone else." Andrew told him softly. "But, if you think this feeling will continue, we can look for other solutions. I do not want you to feel like this. It breaks my heart. I think you're enough, I know you'll be enough, but we won't know until we take the plunge." Andrew told him softly.
Maxwell let out a soft sigh, nuzzling into Andrew's throat on the other side.
"Okay. Thank you for listening and not making fun of me." Maxwell said and Andrew's heart jerked. In what world would he make fun of this man? That was never going to happen. Not ever. Especially over something like this.
"You don't need to thank me for listening to you. Ever. Tell me all of your concerns. Fuck. I want to hear them. I love to hear them. It makes me feel even closer to you." Andrew told him and Maxwell let out a shuddery little sigh.
"Okay." Maxwell paused for a moment. "It…makes me feel closer to you too, but I get so shaky. Like I'm afraid you're going to say that you don't want to hear them." Andrew's heart broke hearing that.
"I will always want to hear them, and I am always willing to comfort you if you need me too." Andrew promised. "Anywhere, everywhere. You can stop by at work and just crawl into my lap if you want. I won't complain." Andrew promised and felt Maxwell nod against his throat.
They sat like that until Maxwell felt better.