Chapter 109: Replace You? Never!
Koda;
I can not count how many times in my life I have opened my eyes from sleep and thanked Goddess Thalyra for the gift of sight.
However, this morning... This morning is one of those mornings when I am truly grateful that I can see.
Because today I woke up to the prettiest sight I’ve ever seen. A bright pair of blood red eyes that reflect light in such a way that they look like diamonds.
He turns in my arms to face me, and I watch his cheeks flush as he quickly looks away.
"Good morning." I greet him, and almost immediately, the scent in the room shifts.
Honey. Again.
I take a deep breath to fill my lungs, and subconsciously, my grip on him tightens.
"Did you sleep well?" I question, and his cheeks turn a redder shade.
"I... I did." He stutters, and my smile grows.
I gently loosen one hand from around his waist, and he stares down expectantly at my other hand, expecting me to release it too.
But I know the moment I do that, he’ll bolt out of here. I don’t want that. I want to enjoy this moment.
I brush his hair away from his eyes, and he looks back up at me.
"You need a haircut. Your hair is starting to completely cover your eyes." I note, and he blinks at me.
He stares in silence for a while, and then he speaks.
"Why are you like this?" He questions, and my brows crease.
"Like what?" I question, and he lets out a breath.
"I don’t know..." He replies, and I raise a brow.
"Why are you... the way you are? Since I got here... you’ve never yelled at me. You’ve never... malhandled me... you’re always so... kind and gentle. Sometimes I worry it might be fake. Is this really who you are? And why are you like this?" He adds, and I take a moment when I see the look in his eyes.
The sadness... the fear... It’s not just any type of fear. It’s fear that he might get hurt if he trusts me. Fear that I might hurt him.
But I guess it’s a good thing that he’s asking these questions, right? It means he’s considering trusting me.
Whatever I say now is very important, so I must be careful and only speak the truth.
I stare at the young man in my arms, and I rewrap my arms around him before pulling him closer to myself.
"I’m this way because I was raised to be like this. I spent the formative periods of my life under my mother, and... in that time she made sure I learned so much from her." I begin as my mind wanders back to the beautiful childhood days I had here.
The days I spent learning from my mother and the elders of the sleuth.
"Kindness is the most important currency. It costs you nothing, but can earn you a lot." I begin, saying off the top of my head some of the things my mother taught me.
"Just because you’re right doesn’t mean the other party is wrong. Force is hardly the first answer you should give to a problem. Life is a circle. What you give will always find its way to give back to you." I continue before looking back at Elián, and as he listens with wrapped attention to me, I can’t help wondering what he’s thinking.
"The most important lesson she taught me is the fact that I’m an Alpha doesn’t make me better than anyone else. I’ve been blessed with a privilege. My blessing shouldn’t be a curse to others." I speak honestly as I tell him the truth that has been my guiding principle, and his jaw drops.
"That’s why I am the way I am. That’s why I treat you the way I treat you. I’m lucky to have you as my omega. I’m not entitled. You are a person with a heart and feelings. My first and foremost role as your Alpha is caring for them." I conclude, and he stays silent.
Almost dazed as he stares at me. I move closer to him, and he doesn’t budge.
"All I want is to be the perfect Alpha for you. I don’t want to hurt you, Elián. I would rather walk on thorns than do that willingly. I just want to build a family with you, but I will take no step towards that if you don’t allow it." I whisper and he swallows.
"But you could replace me. You could get yourself another omega for some reason. Be it to protect him, or because I won’t give you what you want..." He mumbles, and I smile when I realise what he’s talking about.
Rhydian must have really hurt him by taking Bram on as his second omega.
"No one can ever take your place. There isn’t another Elián anywhere else. Even if there were, he wouldn’t replace you. Bram can try his best... but when it comes to taking your place, his best could never be enough." I answer reassuringly, and his eyes widen.
He wasn’t expecting me to know why he asked that question, but I do. And I’d be damned before I sit back and watch him question his worth.
"Also, I’ll wait for you, Elián," I add, and his brows knot.
"Wait for?" He questions, and I smile.
"For you to choose me. For you to tell me that you’re okay building a family with me." I reply, and something shifts in his eyes...
Like a wall crumbling.
"If you’re not ready... I’ll wait. For you, I have all the time in the world. Enjoy your life. Do you. I’ll wait. But know that I don’t want a family if it’s not with you. So throw away those thoughts of being replaced." I add, and he stares blankly at me. It’s almost like he can not believe the answers I’m giving him.
"What if... What if your Father can’t wait? He seems to want an heir pretty soon." He replies, and I adjust my head against my pillow as I stare at his precious face.
"You belong to me. Not my Father. No one is going to dictate to me how to treat you, or what to do with you." I assure him, and I watch him blink back tears.
I lean closer to him and plant a kiss on his forehead. I feel his small hands move against my chest. Not to push me away, though. He just keeps them there.
"Any more questions? I’m more than happy to clear your doubts." I whisper, and he lets out a breath.
"N-none for now." He replies, and I hug him to my chest as I rest my chin against his head.
I’ve never felt this strongly for anyone before. Being with him feels right. It feels like fate. Like it’s meant to be... I don’t want to do life with anyone else.
I want him. Only him. And I hope that someday, he will grow to want me too... grow to love me too...
**********
Igma💙;
I stare at Alana, who’s crouched beside a berry bush, carefully picking fruits. I take a deep breath as the news I have isn’t one I’m sure she’ll like.
I try to walk towards her, but hesitate again. She’s in a pink dress, and she looks so beautiful in it.
Her ears are flopped and relaxed as she pays full attention to inspecting the berries in her hands.
I let a long breath, and her ears peek up straight and turn towards me. She turns to me, and I force a smile.
Her brows crease as she drops the berries in her hands into the basket with her, and stands up.
"Alpha Igma..." She greets with a ke, and I frown.
I’ve told her to stop calling me that, but she never listens.
I don’t like it when she’s so formal with me. That, and the fact that she’s my mate.
...Even though I haven’t told her yet. I don’t know how to.
I only recently gained her trust, and got her to be a bit comfortable around me. Father says I should tell her, but I’m scared. I’m not ready to.
What if she pulls away from me because of it?
How do I explain to her that an age-old tradition of us wolves finding mates... a tradition that long perished... how do I explain to her that it came alive in my and her case?
Won’t she think I’m just lying?
"Alpha Igma, is something wrong?" Her gentle voice calls as she walks up to me, and I come back to the present.
Everything else can wait. I need to tell her what I came here to.
I walk over to meet her in the middle and she stares at me as I pull a piece of paper out of my pocket.
She skeptically takes it from me and I wait for her to open it. Her eyes scan over the lines and she freezes.
She looks up at me with wide eyes, and I nod slowly to assure her that what she’s just read is true.