Chapter 144: I Love You
Koda;
I could hear Elián humming absentmindedly as he swung gently from the twines he wove together.
However, soon, I couldn’t hear a thing. Not the creaking of the branch or twines as he moves, or his gentle hums.
He just went quiet.
I know Elián. He prefers company to being alone. So... today, when he asked if there was a quiet place he could be alone... I didn’t understand.
But I didn’t ask questions either. It didn’t seem like something he wanted to converse about.
I brought him out here and decided to stay close enough to keep him safe.
However, now I’m getting worried. What is he thinking about, and why has he gone silent?
He’s still there...I can smell him. But silence and Elián don’t usually go hand in hand.
I get out of the water, shake myself dry, and walk to the other side of the bushes.
"Elián? You’ve suddenly gone quiet. Are you okay??" I question when I see him. His back is turned to me, and he’s still sitting on his contraption of twines... just... not moving.
What’s going on with him?
"I...I’m fine. I was just... thinking about something." He replies, and the disoriented tone in his voice makes my brows knot.
I walk over to him and sit on the floor in front of him. He looks down at me, and I see worry on his face.
I reach out and gently caress his cheek as he stares down at me.
"Elián, you can tell me if something is bothering you. What’s wrong?" I whisper, and his shoulders fall as he stares at me.
I watch him gently get off the swing and sit on the floor in front of me.
"Koda..." He whispers as his warm hands hold my hand against his soft cheek.
"We both know... Nothing about my past. Who I was... where I’m from... the things I did..." He begins, and I tilt my head as I stare at him.
"What if I was a horrible person? What if... what if I had done some bad things, what if... my past is just a nightmare waiting to explode?" He questions further, and finally, he looks up at me.
"...Would you still want me then?" He says with his voice just above a whisper, and my heart skips a beat.
Where are these questions coming from? Can he remember something from his past? Is it something that troubles him?
"I’ve... I’ve gotten so used to life with you that... That I haven’t stopped to realise the danger my past could pose. What if I was a criminal... or... or an assassin or something? How many past mistakes are too many? What if my past is so heavy... You all decide you don’t want me because of it..." He whispers further, and the fear in his voice as he once again looks away from me breaks my heart.
This is what he wanted to come out here to think about??
He takes my hand away from his face and looks away from me like he’s ashamed of himself.
"How can one love someone you know nothing about...?" He says dejectedly, and I smile softly at him.
I take his chin between my thumb and my index finger as I turn his face back to me.
"I love you," I confess calmly, and his eyes widen just a bit in shock.
"And you’re not someone I know nothing about. You’re Elián. You love food, sleep... chaos, apples, books, and now... babies too." I add, and I see the ghost of a smile tug at his lips.
I move closer to him and ruffle his hair.
"You have a big heart. A very bad temper, a tongue as sharp as a blade, and all this interesting feistiness is kept in this tiny body of yours." I continue, and this time he chuckles softly.
"Elián, your past doesn’t matter to me. I don’t care what you may have been or why you did them. All I care about is who you are now. And the person in front of me... is as pure as freshly bloomed cotton. You’re not evil. You’re not a nightmare. I know that. Whatever you may have done in your past... I refuse to judge your actions when I have no clue the choice you may have had to choose from." I whisper to him as I place my forehead against his... and I hear him sniffle.
"You... you mean that?" He croaks, and in one motion, I wrap my arm around him and scoop him onto my legs.
He wraps his legs around my waist and buries his face in the crook of my neck as I stroke his back.
"I mean it. If the past Elián made mistakes that made him a monster, I choose to only see the angel he has become today." I assure him as I kiss his hair, and he sniffles as he falls silent.
"I love you, Koda..." He croaks, and my heart skips a beat.
"I’m happy fate got us together... Starting a family with you would be a dream..." He adds, and my jaw drops as I hold him.
I smile happily as I tighten my hold on him.
He just confessed!!
Elián just said he loves me!!
"Why dream when we can make it happen?" I say, and he deepens the hug as he takes a deep breath.
"Yeah... Let’s make it happen." He replies, and I chuckle.
Never did I think it would be this easy to hear him permit me to get him pregnant.
He really means this??
My patience actually won!
"I’m not going to have a baby out of wedlock though..." He mumbled, and I pause.
I can’t help the laughter that erupts out of me, and he pulls away to stare at me with raised brows and a pout.
"Why are you laughing? I mean it! My baby’s not gonna be an out-of-wedlock baby!" He rants, and I laugh harder.
"Is that you proposing to me?" I tease, and his eyes widen.
"How unromantic!" I add, repeating the exact words he used the time I casually asked him to marry me.
"You’re a jerk!" He whines as he hits my chest, and I can’t help but laugh harder as I hold him against myself.